Occupy Christmas

Earlier this week, my friend K re-posted this Occupy Christmas list from Rage Against the Minivan and I wanted to share it with you all!

I'm a big believer in having a simple Christmas. I'm of the less is more camp when it comes to decorations and, more importantly, I believe in giving big and buying small. For me, that means making handmade gifts instead of buying things, donating to charities, and focusing on spending time together with loved ones instead of shopping for them.

I spent most of my childhood having simple - and wonderful! - Christmases. After my parents got divorced, my mom went through this purging period where she donated most of our Christmas decorations. I'm pretty sure she gave our entire Christmas village and Christmas train to our landscaper one day. After that, our house always felt festive with just my great-grandmother's creche, a pretty tree strung with white lights, homemade garland and whatever "brilliant" decorating ideas my sister and I had, and some natural garland with big red bows on the staircase, mantel and front door. We made homemade Christmas ornaments as our Christmas presents for all of my grandparents, aunts, and uncles every year. We always did some kind of donation or project for a nonprofit. And we were limited to three Christmas presents from Santa. I was always confused when I saw movies and the kids had these long, rambling lists. But my mom told me Jesus got three presents, so that is what we got. :-)

Looking back, I'm so grateful that our Christmas was focused on volunteering and charity and that Christmas was mostly about the excitement of going to visit our huge family in Miami. I remember opening Christmas presents on Christmas morning, but truth be told, I can't tell you what a single one of those presents were. What I do remember is my grandparents waiting for me to get off the plane, waking up to a house full of aunts and uncles who had brought donuts, singing Christmas carols, and helping bake lots of cookies, cakes, and other yummy foods in a packed kitchen. These are the memories that have stood the test of time - and they have nothing to do with gifts.

As I've grown up, and as Brett and I think about what we want our Christmases to look like, it can be hard to resist the idea that you need to have a ton of huge presents underneath a decorated-to-the-max-with-ornaments-from-Pottery-Barn tree. That is what society tells us a "merry" Christmas looks like (and that is advertised every .5 seconds). But this Christmas, amidst all of the commercialized mess, I feel like more and more people are embracing a simple Christmas. It seems like there are more people who are trying to give creatively and not just give the biggest present. There seems to be more of an emphasis on giving back and helping those who are less fortunate. And there seems to be a focus on spending time instead of money.

So here is to a simple and peaceful Christmas this year! To a Christmas that has everything to do with love, family and special traditions, and very little to do with wish lists! 

P.S. If you are still looking for some gift ideas (I know I am!), be sure to check out Rage Against the Minivan's fantastic post or K's gift guides.

Which Retailers Are Working to Prevent Abusive Labor Practices?

Source

Not For Sale, a nonprofit that works to fight modern-day slavery, has recently released a report on major retailers and the systems they have in place to address and prevent modern slavery*. The group has given the retailers grades, and while I didn't see anything really surprising in the report, it is always great to see a chart as detailed as this one to help guide your shopping.

What stores failed/almost failed?

• Abercrombie & Fitch (includes Hollister)
• Aeropostale
• Aramark
• Armor Holdings
• Blauer
• Bob Barker
• Carter's (owns OshKosh B' Gosh)
• Express
• Forever 21 (why does anyone still shop here?!?!)
• Fruit of the Loom
• Garan
• Lacoste
• Propper
• Quicksilver (owns Roxy)
• Robinson Textiles
• Rocky
• Skechers
• Spiewak
• Walmart (owns Faded Glory, No Boundaries, and Simply Basic)

I know I'll be avoiding these companies in the near future and using my wallet to tell them that fair labor practices are a MUST.

*Note: I'm not sure how I feel about the term "modern slavery," but I'm using it here because that is the language that Not For Sale uses. 

A Feminist Budget: Part 1

Lately, I've noticed a trend among my friends and many bloggers. We're all slightly obsessed with budgeting.

It started when my friend, Kim, posted a link to The Simple Mom about budgeting and getting out of debt. Then, some women from the fabulous Wellesley College held a workshop on budgeting and building wealth. Our alumnae network started a virtual group about finance, where I learned about some great blogs like Get Rich Slowly and Make Love, Not Debt. This was a whole new corner of the blogosphere for me, but everyone I knew seemed to be reading them or discovering them at the same time. My best friends and I would chat about Dave Ramsey and Roth IRAs while sipping coffee.

All of this new information and excitement about budgeting and managing money got me excited! It also helped me feel in control of my finances, even though I don't make very much money and have quite a large chunk of student debt.

Here are three of the biggest things I learned:

1. While you have debt, you are living in the past.
Debt is not good. This might be obvious to many of you, but we live in a culture where it is deemed ok, even encouraged, to rack up thousands in student loans, thousands in credit card debt, thousands in car loans, etc. There's this very deeply embedded idea that you should consume, regardless of whether or not you can actually afford it. Now, there are many who are completely opposed to debt or even to credit cards. I'm not one of them. I have credit cards and use them responsibly. I have student loans from graduate school, but to me they were worth it and I wouldn't trade my experience at grad school for anything. In my opinion, certain things might be worth debt, but that is up to the individual and everyone should think long and hard before accruing it. Because while you have debt, you are living in the past. A large portion of your income will be spent paying off something you've already done. I'm all grown up now (or at least pretend to be), but a huge portion of my income goes to student debt. I'd rather pay off my debt quickly and live in the present, where all of my money can be spent on things that I want to do right now or in the future. I don't want to have kids and not be able to go on vacation because I'm still paying for grad school or for a couch that I bought when we first moved in to our apartment in Atlanta. So I'm going to try and avoid accruing any new debt and pay more than the minimum payments required on my car and student loans in an attempt to pay them off as fast as possible (more on this to come).

2. Budgeting is fun! It doesn't restrict spending, it just means you think carefully about where you choose to spend it.
I think I used to hate the idea of a budget because I thought it meant that I couldn't buy anything, that I couldn't have any fun, and that I would never get to buy new clothes or eat out again. But that isn't true. The bottom line is that I only have so much money coming in every month, and it is up to me to think carefully about how I want to spend it. Do I want to pay off debt? Do I want to go shopping? Do I want to go on vacation? Making a budget just means you thought about this and are putting your money where you want it to be going (e.g. to a vacation fund, not Starbucks). Since I can be somewhat of a control freak, I find it lots of fun to sit down at the beginning of the month and plan out where I want my money going.

3. Sometimes you have to go without. 
This also might seem like I'm stating the obvious. But part of managing your money and budgeting is realizing that in order to have more money for the things you need or want to spend it on you might have to give something up. This means thinking carefully about what you're spending your money on and not just uncritically "buying into" the idea that you need certain things (I couldn't help myself!). Do you really need cable? Do you need to eat out? Do you need to go out for drinks instead of staying in? There are often lots of things in a budget that you might feel like you "need" but actually don't. By cutting those out, you free up money for other things.

                                                                    Source: maillardvillemanor.com via Marci on Pinterest

I'll be back soon to share a few more thoughts on budgeting, such as why I think budgeting is all the rage these day (especially among women).

P.S. If you're not already using mint.com to budget and track your spending, you should be!

The Oil Cleansing Method

The other week, while reading the blog No More Dirty Looks, I stumbled across commenters who claimed they washed their face with oil. At first, I was horrified. Then, I was intrigued. A quick Google search informed me that the oil cleansing method is supposed to dissolve dirty oil, makeup, and grime from your face without stripping it of its natural oils. It is also natural and fragrance free, so it is supposed to be less irritating.

Curious, I snuck into my bathroom with my bottle of extra virgin olive oil. I felt like I was doing something rebellious or naughty. Like I was breaking all sorts of rules. I poured the olive oil into my hands and began rubbing it onto my face. My skin felt soothed and moisturized. I rinsed a washcloth in hot water and let it sit on my face for 10-15 seconds, then wiped the oil off. It was luxurious!

The next morning, I was afraid I'd wake up and my skin would be a broken out mess. But it looked great! It was dewy. It wasn't as red as it normally was. It didn't feel tight, and I was able to skip my morning moisturizer.

I've been doing the oil cleansing method for about two weeks now, and I don't know if I will ever go back. I am so in love with it! Not only does it make my skin look better, it is all-natural! I always have olive oil around the house, so it cuts back on the amount of different products I have to buy (especially if I'm able to forgo moisturizer with it). And because I'm able to pour the olive oil straight from the bottle into a recycled glass container from another face mask, it will also cut back on the amount of packaging I use and, inevitably, throw away. I'm guessing it is also much cheaper in the long run.

Source: BBC Food

If you feel like trying it --- and you should! -- here is everything you need to know:

How It Works: 

The reasons we have so much trouble with mainstream skin care products are numerous, but two reasons, in particular, lead the pack. These products strip the oil out of our skin, leaving our largest organ trying to repair itself by replacing the oil stripped away. This leaves us in a cycle of being tight and dry followed by the inevitable oil slick. Each time we strip the oil away, our skin over-compensates for the lack of moisture by creating more oil. On top of the drying effects, these products are highly-scented. Fragrance is one of the top skin irritants and strangely enough, even the so-called "unscented" products usually contain fragrance. See for yourself and check the labels. Dry, irritated skin replaced by oily skin, inflamed and trapping debris?

Getting right down to basics, when cleansing and moisturizing your skin, it is imperative that you keep in mind that oil dissolves oil. Your skin naturally lubricates itself with oil, and as we are creatures of adaptation, one can believe that if this weren't the appropriate built-in care for ourselves, our bodies would have adapted to suit the need. (Source: The Oil Cleansing Method).

What To Do:

1. Find your moisturizing oil. Olive oil, jojoba, and almond oil are the best. Skip the coconut oil for this one, it can clog pores.

2. If you have oily skin, mix the moisturizing oil with castor oil. Castor oil is supposed to draw out the impurities from your skin. If you have acne prone skin, mix three parts castor oil with one part olive oil. If you have dry skin, mix one part castor oil with three parts olive oil. To be honest, I haven't bothered to go and buy any castor oil because I'm lazy and have been quite pleased with using just olive oil. But many people swear by incorporating castor oil. 

3. Massage the oil into your (dry) skin. Enjoy how relaxing it feels!

4. Rinse a clean washcloth with warm water. Put the washcloth on your face and let it "steam" your face for 10 seconds. Then rinse it with more warm water and gently wipe away the oil. 

5. Show off your dewy, moisturized, soothed, and cleansed face! 

Some Advice:

If you're going to try the oil cleansing method, I would really try it. Go all out! Part of what the oil cleansing method does is balance your skin. If you alternate with another harsher face wash, it might not work or lead to break outs.

Similarly, I would skip the moisturizer. Unless your skin is really dry and flaky, go a few days and see if your skin adjusts to the oil cleansing method.

Guest Post: Good Will Hunting

By: Danielle Vermeer

Danielle writes at from two to one about the intersection of marriage, faith, and feminism.  She also has a healthy obsession with vintage dresses, thrift store shopping, and extreme couponing. 

How thrift stores can save you money and save others’ dignity

The average American woman spends between $1,000 and $2,000 every year on clothing, but wears just 20% to 30% of what’s in her closet.  That means that every item in a crowded closet has less than a one in three chance of actually being worn, thereby becoming a waste of space and money.  But the real amount spent on clothing is actually much higher than a couple thousand dollars.  It ignores the price of the stolen childhood of the underage laborer in the cotton fields of Uzbekistan, the pain of the sexual assault survivor in the clothing sweatshop, and the deprivation of liberty of far too many factory workers making our beloved smart phones and e-readers.

In these tough economic times, I propose a solution I’ve abided by for over ten years: thrift store shopping.  Local thrift stores such as Salvation Army, Goodwill, and Village Discount not only offer new and even designer labels for rock-bottom prices, but your money often goes to a great cause in the community.  Buying second-hand clothing at thrift, consignment, and resale stores is also environmentally conscious and does not contribute to the steady supply of clothing made under slave or slave-like conditions.  If that isn’t enough to convince you, then maybe my and Yuka Yoneda’s stories will.

Buying Nothing New

At almost two months into 2012, I can proudly say that I have not bought anything new and that my modest expenses at thrift stores have been long-term investments: a wrap dress for work, a designer dress shirt for the hubby, and an organic cotton onesie for the little one sometime in the future.  Total spent: $5.00.  Compared to regular prices even at discount retailers like Target, I’m still saving 75-90%.  I am actually attempting to buy nothing new this entire year.

But it’s more than just saving big bucks.  It’s about understanding our consequences of our choices, however informed or ignorant those choices may be.  For those who identify and sympathize with a feminist outlook on life, buying secondhand clothes is a no-brainer.  But sometimes, that’s the problem: we don’t think about it, even if we know intuitively that it’s better for us and for our little world. 

Take Yuka Yoneda, for example.  While she is now known for Clossette, a DIY and personal style blog of solely repurposed and “re-loved” clothing, Yuka was not always so keen on wearing pre-owned clothing:

“I was a shopaholic.  Then I learned about where theclothes I was buying came from and how they were affecting and hurting other people, particularly women and children, around the globe.  The idea that these crimes against women, pollution and chemicals going into our water and bodies, and just shear waste were all happening because I wanted a new top or jeans really made me feel ashamed.

I know that for some people, buying clothes that someone else has already worn may sound gross or weird.  But did you know that the shirts, sweaters, skirts, and shoes you’ve been buying at major retailers might be made at factories where sexual assaults are normal occurrences?  I don’t know about you, but that disgusts me way more than the thought of another girl having owned the pair of jeans I’m wearing now.  And I sure as heck am not going to support it.”

Now she is spreading the message one closet at a time until we reach a “thought revolution” full of compassion, dignity, and ethical style.  My vintage dresses and I are all for it.

Blog Sale!

The other day, I went to stuff a sweater in my closet and the hanger actually broke - snapped in two! - as I tried to squeeze it in between two other sweaters.

That, my friends, is a sign that I have too much clothing.

In this recent post, I wrote about how I wanted to learn to live simply. And for me, a huge part of that is getting rid of clothing. I love clothes! But I have too much and I hate going near my closet when it is crammed full of stuff, especially when I no longer wear lots of it. I hate clutter, and I'm an all-or-nothing person when it comes to organizing. Its either free from unwanted clothing, color-coordinated, on matching hangars and amazing, or I just leave all my clothes on the floor and stuffed in a corner until B curses at the piles and forces me to face the cluttered closet.

On top of my own issues, I feel that it is wasteful to hoard clothing that I don't wear. I'd much rather see it being used by someone than sitting on my shelf month after month, year after year. There are too many people in the world who need shoes for me to have two pairs of loafers hiding in the back of my closet.

So this week I went through my shoes and picked some to get rid of. I hope that some of you, dear readers, might find them useful and affordable purchases. If we're all working on having less in our closets, devoting less of our budgets toward clothing, and buying second-hand, then this little blog sale can help us all get there!

How it works: I've posted photos and descriptions of the items below. Please feel free to email me at hill.shannonpatgmail.com with any questions about an item or to let me know if you want to buy something. None of the prices include shipping.

Happy shopping!

SOLD
Anne Klein Loafers

Size 6
Black with gold AK logo 

Purchased for $40

Worn only once

Selling for $5

J.Crew Rain Boots
Size 7
Pink with white scottie dog motif
Worn but in good condition
Purchased for $60
Selling for $10

SOLD
Born boots
Size 7
Worn but in good condition
There are some water spots on the leather but I don't think it compromises the look of the book
Lined with shearling
These boots are incredibly comfortable and well-made, Born boots are amazing - I just have way too many pairs of brown boots
Purchased for $250
Selling for $25

Black Knee High Miu Miu Boots

Size 96

Very Dark Brown/Black Boots Lined with Shearling

Can be worn folded down to show the lining or unfolded for an over-the-knee look

Side Buckle Detail

Inside Zip Closure

The heels are scuffed and peeling, which you can see in the second to last picture

When you're wearing them you can barely see this (I tried to show this in the last picture)

Original Price: $900*

Selling for $75

Please do send me an email if you have any questions. If you didn't find what you're looking for, I'll be posting more clothing next weekend once I've gone through all my winter clothes.

*Just a little note: These boots were a gift. I did not pay the $900 for them myself. :-)

The Feminist Halloween!

Halloween is upon us, which means an onslaught of slutty, racist costumes is also upon us.

Many blogs have devoted posts on how not to offend on Halloween, so I'm just going to support their message by saying: Please don't dress up in racist costumes! As a general rule of thumb, if you are dressing up as another race/ethnicity/culture - the costume is racist. If you are dressing up as another race/ethnicity/culture that has been marginalized, colonized, or mass murdered by anyone in the Western World - that costume is especially racist. That means, for example, that no one should be dressing up as a: Mexican, Asian, Black Person, Arab, any woman wearing any sort of Muslim head covering, Indian, or (a costume I find particularly offensive) Native American. That's right folks! If you are a white person living in the United States, it is not ok to dress up as a Native American Princess, Pocahontas, Native American chief, or warrior. Our ancestors and our government have historically - and are still currently - trying to eradicate their culture, so it is not a good idea to dress up in a form of their cultural dress as a form of cultural parody.

Ohio University's Students*Teaching*About*Racism*in Society group has organized a fantastic campaign with these posters:

                                                         

I would also argue that dressing up as any sort of marginalized group is offensive; that means no dressing up as a welfare queen or "ghetto" African American. Poverty isn't funny. And it isn't a costume.

Now for an issue I find slightly more complicated - should we dress up as sluts on Halloween?

I admit I am guilty of this. My Halloween costumes have always been on the sluttier side - except for last year when I dressed up in my mom's old flight attendant uniform. If that costume is considered slutty, it isn't my fault, it is the airline industry of the '70s.

Mom's old uniform! An ode to powder blue and orange polyester.

Honestly, I think it is fine to dress up as someone or something slutty for Halloween - so long as you feel comfortable doing so. I don't however, appreciate the sexualization of every.single.damn.thing on Halloween. Brett and I recently went to a Halloween store to find some Halloween decorations, and I was disgusted by the overtly sexualized, frequently racist, and way too expensive Halloween costumes. I didn't see a single non-sexual costume for women.

I've never had a nurse dressed like this

Alice in Wonderland was a tramp

In real life, a cop would arrest this woman for prostitution

Cleopatra - Queen of the Midriff Baring Halter Top and Mini Skirt Combo. Let's sexualize all female political figures throughout history!

You can be sexy and cute without wearing one of these porn-esque costumes. And I think women should make a general push to be a little more creative when coming up with Halloween costumes. Don't just run to a Halloween store and buy the "Sexy (insert occupation or Disney heroine here)" costume. Dress up as a historical figure or famous feminist! There is a middle ground between looking like a zombie and sexified cop.